This is Why You Shouldn’t Pity the Paraplegic


Today I am writing about paraplegic woman not just because I want to, but because I really need to.

This particular topic I’m about to discuss is how a paraplegic woman in wheelchair feels. It is something I deal with on a regular basis. Many, many times, I have just let it go. I’ve done it again and again. Seriously, I have lost count of how many times this has happened to me… Sometimes it’s better to shut your mouth and be the bigger person, but this time, that’s not the case.

I’m getting a bit ahead of myself here. The reader is probably wondering what I’m even on about (lol) so let me take a few wheels back – Why say steps when I’m not walking?

Alright so here’s the thing. I love sympathetic people. In this day and age, where cruelty seems to be around pretty much every corner, its so refreshing to me when I experience that yes, there are still human beings out there who give a damn.

So before I get into what I’ve needed to get off my shoulders, I do want it to be known that yes, I have absolute respect for anyone who can be there for someone during a rough time.  Those who can put on the shoes of the person struggling and begin to feel that pain that’s not truly theirs. People who are not selfish and are only concerned with their feelings. I wish there were more like that in this world, now that I come to think of it.

Anyway, while I look at kind people like Earth angels, there is something I just can’t stand.

I can no longer swallow my pride and let people I know, and even people who arent a part of my life, feel bad for me for using a wheelchair.

Not that I was scared, but I guess I didn’t realize till later on down the road that this had been being bottled up and would wind up being something I needed to vent about.

Here’s What You Need To Understand About Paraplegic Woman

I get that you may feel bad for me for how I ended up becoming a paraplegic woman in wheelchair in the first place. It only makes sense that your heart too would break knowing a baby was mistreated by her father and left as a paraplegic… Because let’s be real, that is ridiculously upsetting to have happened. I am the girl who lives with it every single day. 24 years later, the fact I was child abused still hurts my heart. That fact alone is the hurtful one.  But that’s the only hurtful aspect of my life.

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Want to know what I don't understand?

I don’t get and quite frankly, I’m largely annoyed and becoming more offended each time this happens to me…

… when someone decides that it is so appropriate to pity me and look far down on me JUST because I am not up walking around. Honestly, it really triggers me that a person could see me face to face, see how bright, happy and carefree I am, and still tell me how sorry they are for me. It’s like, all the hard work I have put into becoming the strong woman I am today, has been put in a box and shoved down a flight of stairs, and the damn basement door has been slammed shut too.

A smart individual would be able to realize, after encountering a girl like me, that just because you are not standing up, does not mean that you should be looked at as unfortunate.

I am the furthest thing from that. I’ve always been. Ever since the night I survived all of this when no one thought I would.

Today,  nobody expects me to be happy, and even when they see that I am, they still somehow get stuck in that unhealthy state of mind I like to call…


Life does not stop, nor does it get less interesting the day you no longer use your legs and become a paraplegic woman in wheelchair. For me, it allowed me to up my game. Show not only others but most importantly myself, just how strong I was.

That is why I’m not happy when I am frowned upon.

And that is how I came up with my ‘avoid the bullshit strategy,’ anytime I am told how dreadful my life must be. Guess what? I feel bad for those who look down on me..for one reason.

‘They don’t realize there is more to life than being able to
stand up from a chair.’

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I promise I am just as happy as the next person walking down the street on a warm summers day.

Truth be told, I may be just a bit happier…for I know that the key to living a happy life has nothing to do with physical ability.

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Courtney Cirabisi

Courtney Cirabisi is a 26 year old writer who lives in Michigan. She became reliant on a wheelchair for everyday mobility after she was child abused by her dad back in 1993, resulting with a spinal cord injury.

She loves acting as well, and thrives on showing people that life doesn't stop when you are not walking. Courtney knows that the mind is the most important thing a person can have.

What matters in life hasn't been lost, and with that knowledge she is able to confidently go about spreading her happy to be alive vibes. She's currently working on a memoir about her life and aims to have it out on shelves one day.

Check out her Facebook & Youtube page for the latest! Facebook

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